back to basics

my mom's old dolly laundry basket :-)

as i write this, the sweet smell of birthday cake cooling on the counter wafts through the house, the big boys are getting the tent cozy for tomorrow night's slumber party, and the little one is napping. sometimes people assume that by the time you have 3 kids, you must be an old pro. it's true that many things do get easier the more experience one gains, but many other things get more complicated. i've been thinking about how many pregnancy, birth and early child hood books i read when my first was coming along. i think i read one book on pregnancy the second time around (ina may gaskin's newer book) and by now it seems all the reading i'm doing is focused on where my oldest son is at. this last week i was grateful to have my memory jogged by two great resources, which is necessary from time to time because even though the information is in my brain somewhere, i can't always find it when i need it. donna ashton over at the waldorf connection has a great homeschool expo going on right now with lots of great free online workshops. last week i listened to her talk with kim john payne, author of simplicity parenting, which i highly recommend. and one of my absolute favorite blogs, the parenting passageway, had another gem which i've been meditating on for the last few days. she reminds us to keep these 3 simple things in mind when parenting through tantrums and squabbles: don't act in the heat of the moment. wait for everyone to calm down so you can guide and take advantage of a teachable moment. try to help everyone (including mom) identify and express their needs. or for younger ones, interpret those needs for them. and finally, DO something. get up and physically help your kids and try to stay away from too many words. these ideas and those that were discussed on the expo talk were nothing new to me, but i found myself listening and reading and having these "aha" moments. like, "oh yeah, i've really been forgetting x,y, and z." so give thanks for these crucial reminders that are helping me stay sane and positive!